My beautiful friend, Meghan, did a fabulous Wizardly Words on Wednesdays post a couple of weeks ago, about “Up Levelling”. Yes, we know that “up levelling” isn’t a Gene Keys word, and you would be right in thinking that the main point of our Wizardly Words was to give you our take on, and our personal definitions of some of the words in the Gene Keys lexicon.

But bear with us here, please! You see, the Wizardly Words articles are not written (or videoed, as in Meghan’s case) in a vacuum. They are an integral part of the inner work that we are currently doing, just like everything we write and create here in our Cauldron of Crones is intricately twined around our inner work. We choose words that are coming up for us as part of the Gene Keys journey we are on.

Now, Meghan and I talk every single day on Voxer, leaving long voice notes for each other, verbalising our contemplations on where we’re at in our journey, talking about what’s been coming up, what breakthroughs we’re having. And for several weeks at the beginning of this year, we were having lots of juicy conversations about creative up levelling. We were talking a lot about how, the deeper we go in this Gene Keys work, the more we want to up level our creativity.

In so many of the Gene Keys (maybe all of the Gene Keys), as you listen to Richard Rudd’s audios, you will hear him say, in one way or another, “you do this through creativity”, or “you access this gift through creativity”. It is also integral to so many of the Sphere’s in your Gene Keys chart (maybe all of the Spheres!!!). I’m working with my Evolution sphere right now, as I write this article, and I have just read this quote from Richard …

The Sphere of Evolution is the pressure point in your profile that drives your growth, helping to turn your suffering into creativity.

Creativity is a wonderful way to work with your Shadows; Creativity can help you to move into your Gift.

Explosive Creativity

As you may know from my recent Travel Essays, I am currently travelling through my Gene Keys Golden Path with the Sage’s Retreat. In the Life’s Work teaching’s, Richard Rudd says this …

Genius is a hallmark of the Gift frequency band where self-forgiveness leads to a progressive opening of your heart, resulting in an explosion of creative energy throughout your being.

If genius is the hallmark of the Gift frequency, then I can tap into my own genius by doing more of what I love, because that is what unlocks my Dynamism.

I just have to look at what happens when I have a particularly juicy journaling session, where I lose myself completely in the words that are flowing through me onto the page … I am energised; I am Dynamic.

And it is creativity that feeds my Dynamism, which in turn makes me more creative! It is a glorious loop.

And of course, my creativity grows more, as I open my heart more.

For the last three years, as I have been diving deeper and deeper into my Gene Keys, I have consistently opened my heart more and more. And with that heart-opening experience, I have written thousands upon thousands of words (hundreds and hundreds of thousands of words!). I have created a website and a Podcast with Meghan.

I am feeling all this joy and exuberance coursing through me.

And the explosion of creative energy has not been one of a big bang then a fizzling out; it’s been more like an infinite chain of fire crackers, with each small explosion setting off the next. And of course, occasionally, the next firework in the chain is a rocket that showers me in light and colour and sparkles.

These are magical fireworks; they never run out. They’re in my Bottomless Bag of Resourcefulness. I can rest in between the burst of creativity, and then I can pull the next firework chain out of my bag, and set the explosions of light off again, whenever I want to.

Self-Forgiveness as the Catalyst for the Opening of My Heart

I hadn’t really thought of self-forgiveness as the catalyst for the opening of my heart, until I read those words of Richard’s, but I can see now that it really is a massive factor in this process of opening my heart.

As I have come to love myself more, I have found that self-forgiveness comes as part of the process.

If I love myself, truly love myself, then I cannot continue to beat myself up for my mistakes. If I stop beating myself up for every bad choice and every messy situation I’ve found myself in, then I can find more space for love. And that space is what opens my heart more.

There is no limit to how far I can open my heart. I don’t ever reach a point where I think, oh, that’s my heart open as far as it will go, I’ll stop doing the work now! No, I open more. And it’s so interesting when you realise that not forgiving yourself or others is the very thing that blocks your heart from opening more. This work is kind of addictive, but what a sweet addiction to have! To feel the pull to open your heart more leads you to forgiveness as a way to feed that habit. I want more! I want more love, so I go after more forgiveness … of myself and of others.

Self-Forgiveness Leads to Even More Creativity

Forgiveness becomes a habit. And it’s a beautiful habit to form, because every morsel of forgiveness creates a field of love energy around it. I am thinking here about the forgiveness I have found for my mother through doing this work. My ever-opening heart led me to a place where I wanted to forgive her, where I saw that she had been so wounded that it was a wonder she could parent me at all.

As I let my forgiveness flow out onto her, even though she’s no longer alive to feel it, a glorious thing happened … the energy of forgiveness washed back over me, like a wave returning to the beach.

And that wave of self-forgiveness, threw my heart even wider. And then, what happened?

Great explosions of creativity as we birthed and built our Cauldron of Crones website; great bursting fireworks of dynamism and joy.

It’s all connected … love, forgiveness, self-forgiveness, creativity, dynamism.

And I had to be patient with myself. All the wounding from my mother happened in my SQ, EQ and IQ years, from birth (and before) to 21 years old. And when did these explosive breakthroughs of forgiveness happen? When I was 62! After almost 30 years of being in this interiority of my inner world. I was patient. I was gentle. I was committed. I was devoted to my inner work and to my healing, I was devoted to opening my heart more every day.

As I have dropped deeper and deeper into this inner work, so much wonder has been awakened in me. It’s so much more than just seeing the Gifts within the Shadows … haha!! As if “just” is a big enough word to describe the enormity of that truth, that discovery of the Gift within the Shadow.

It is a life-changing experience to realise that these Shadows that have stalked our days, sometimes for decades, are actually doorways into Gifts. You could take that one piece of the Gene Keys teachings and have a gloriously fulfilling life.

But there is more. If you have the courage to keep going deeper.

Fathomless Depths of Creativity

There are fathomless depths of creativity within you, which you discover with every dive into your interior.

There is this beautiful sentence in the Sage teachings, “As you soften your resistance, creativity, originality, and artistic perception emerge.”, and I can see this in my life.

You see, for me, my Shadows are all about “resistance”. They are fear in many forms, they freeze me, they constrict me, they make me resist life. For me, that “resistance” is the opposite of acceptance, and acceptance has been a gift of great magnitude for me. The Gene Keys and my honest exploration of my Shadows has softened my resistance and ushered in acceptance.

And one of the aspects of myself which I have come to accept is my creativity.

I am creative. I am a creative human. So what that I didn’t go to art school?! So what if I can’t paint, or I don’t believe I can call myself a “real artist”!

I am called to be creative every single day.

Time to Up Level

And right now, I am being called to up-level my creativity.

My perception of life is changing, growing, evolving. I am seeing further. I am seeing more.

And as I see more, I feel more.

And as I feel more, I want to express myself more creatively.

I want to share my creativity. I want to write more poetically. I want to share more honesty. I want my raw emotions to be crafted into words that will move people to examine their own feelings.

My perception of creativity has changed as I have become more honest with myself. The more layers I strip away, the more authentic my writing becomes.

I am not just writing from my heart now; I am writing from my soul. I am writing from my bones, my blood, my cells.

My whole body is part of my creativity.

My breath is part of my writing.

My heart beats onto the page.

Whatever you do in life, it must be infused with the elements of creativity and originality.
Richard Rudd

And it is! Even my most mundane tasks are done with a dash of creativity. Even emails I write at work are written creatively. I come up with original solutions. I break the ground and others follow. I bring creativity and originality into every day with my journal writing and articles and posts. I am an original. There aren’t any other people like me at work. And in a place full of people who are all so different, that is saying something!

And my life is filled with creativity now.

That dream I had of being a creative has come true. That’s who I am now.

My Creativity as a Somatic Experience

This up levelling of my creativity is a somatic experience for me now. My creativity is an aspect of the prime matter of my being. It is elemental. It is the air and the earth; it is the fire in my belly and the water of my flowing emotions.

Every elementary particle of me is involved in my creativity now. It has integrated into my body, into the particles and neutrons of this vessel that carries me through life.

Now, I don’t know if anyone reading my words will even be aware of any of this, but it is a deep transformation within me.

Creativity is no longer something that I do, it is something that I am.

I am writing from a place where I’m seeing more. I’m seeing more connections.

I am connected to everything and everyone.

The void, out of which my creativity emerges, is no longer something inside me … I am the void.

I am everything, and I am nothing.

I am full, and I am empty.

I am the nothing out of which everything is born.

I am not just writing and creating words, I am creating myself.

I am becoming the Creative (Capital Fucking C!) that I was always meant to be.