My Wizardly Word this week is “patience”. The last of those four pillars in the Noble Code of the Gene Keys. This is a really important word for me in this journey of the inner work, so important that it is one of my Words for the Year 2025!

I chose “patience” as a word for the 2025 in the late summer of 2024, when I already knew that I would be spending a year journeying with Hayley Curtis and a small group of women in her Devoted container.

I chose “patience” so that I might be prepared going into Devoted for it to take time. I knew that I would need to be practicing patience every day. I knew that I would need to keep remembering that transformation can take time; that it’s not all flash bang epiphanies. More often it is patiently putting one foot in front of the other.

Patience was the energy that I wanted to wrap around my body for my Devoted journey.

Patience brings in non-judgement, so bringing this energy to a whole year of Devoted work, I hoped to consciously suspend self-judgement; I hoped to be patient with the fact that I am a work in progress. (I’m afraid to say, that I am still having to remind myself almost daily that I have to be patient and that I’m supposed to be being non-judgmental!!)

I would like to take you on an exploration of this idea of patience as it has slowly grown within me over the last two years.

My Journey with Patience

Patience is Gentleness’s sister. She holds my hand and says, it’s okay that you’ve been doing this work for so long but still feel like you’re at the beginning.

Patience says this is part of the natural cycle of life.

Patience says this work is about the journey and that is absolutely okay if it takes a lifetime to make this journey back to yourself.

Patience tells me there is no rush. There is no quick fix. There is a whole lifetime of journeying ahead of me.

Patience tells me that my answers will come in the stillness of my inner well, the void that lives at the heart of me.

I have to stop trying to rush ahead.

This could be one of the greatest gifts that the Gene Keys give me … the patience to wait in the pause for the wisdom to bubble up. (How do I NOT have Patience in my chart?!!)

The big elephant in the room (there’s a joke in there … Elephant is the Dream Arc animal for the Gene Key Gift of Patience!) that jumps out at me is impatience. Most of my life I have been an impatient person. (Although this IS something that has massively shifted since I started doing this Gene Keys work).

My impatience would spill out and affect other people. My husband, who is the most patient man, often caught the brunt of it. But I know, through self-reflection, that most of my impatience was always levelled at myself. And yes, this definitely came from a lack of self-respect.

My impatience all comes from a belief that I am not good enough … I do not respect my own strengths or abilities enough; I do not respect myself at all when I am thinking that I am not good enough, smart enough, quick enough. Perfect!! Why is it that I think I should be fucking perfect, flawless. And when I find that I am not, that I then treat myself like shit because of that perceived imperfection.

Patiently Learning Patience

If you are patient and unreactive, the light will shine through in the end.

That might be the biggest lesson I have to learn from this Shadow of Impatience!

Patience is something I am learning to cultivate in my life.

Patience has never been easy for me, particularly when it is partnered with knowledge, with intellect. I have always had this belief that I have to figure everything out, and I have to do it right now, in order to feel worthy. My whole life, I have felt that my worth is predicated on knowing stuff, on getting all the answers right, on getting the answer first. It goes against a lifetime of conditioning to say … be patient, don’t try to figure it out, don’t react … clarity WILL come.

Loving the Patient Way, Loving the Gap

I like this way of Patience much more than that Shadowy land of Impatience! So often a thread that has run through my inner work has been a desire to be more calm and serene, because I seem to always be rushing … to do things, to learn things, to find the answers, to fix myself. This shift in attitude to waiting, to pausing, to being patient, this is where the answers actually lie!

In the gap, in the space, in the void, in the field of pure potentiality.

And I know this to be true. I can see this in my own inner work. I’ve been doing this for decades, but it’s only now that I feel as if I am getting to the real treasure, the gold deep inside me that this inner work is mining. And I am able to be patient. I have waited a long time, slowly walking this path that has led me right here, and it is so fucking worth it.

I’m exactly where I’m meant to be.

Exactly Who I Am

My friend and Gene Keys Guide, Hayley Curtis said to me once, “The question “who am I?” takes time, patience and deep contemplation”.

Who am I? The question that lies at the root of all my seeking. It takes time to uncover the answer because that answer is forever evolving. There is no definitive answer, unless it’s the last thing you think before dying. 

I am evolving, changing, transforming, so the answer to “who am I?” is changing too. And we need to take time over answering it, because who I am in this moment is built upon who I have been in all the moments that came before.

Who I am is my history; it’s every breakthrough I’ve had, and every dream that I hold.

Who I am is also who I am becoming.

Who am I? I am a woman who is travelling her path (patiently!), trying to understand who the fuck she is!

The contemplation needs to be deep, it needs to take time so that I might drop through all those layers of self I have piled on to protect myself and to hide my true inner light.

Who I am is not the surface self; who I am has been obscured by layers of Life, of trauma, of experiences.

Who I am is hiding behind so many protective barriers, and it takes time and patience to move through those barriers, and with every step towards the core of me, I build the strength and trust to move deeper.

And doing this work is changing me, so who I am is evolving even by this act of seeking her out. It’s a glorious dance to the rhythm of Life. It’s an ecstatic dance. And every sinuous movement, every step, simultaneously brings me closer to my essence and changes that essence forever.

I feel as if now, with this work on the Gene Keys, I am finally moving into freedom. True freedom. As I have peeled back layer after layer, as I have opened my heart more and more, I am learning that only by surrendering, do I find true freedom.

And Who I Am is a Woman Learning to be Patient

I am learning patience, as I learn more about myself.

The patience is being born out of my trust in life and my trust in myself. It’s taken a long time and a hard road to get right here, right now, and it was worth it.

I love my life.

I love myself.

I am gradually, gently and with patience, releasing the bonds that kept me tethered to the past.

Living in the present moment, flowing with the drift of my destined path, these are the things that bring me freedom.

These ARE freedom.

And freedom only comes with patience.

It’s ALL About the Love

Love is the greatest success. Patience is the measure of the quality of a person’s soul. A metric for success is how patient you are becoming with yourself and with your life.
Hayley Curtis

Oh, now that is something I completely resonate with … love as the greatest success!

Love is everything.

I know that I was already on this path of inner work for years before my husband came back into my life, and I had healed a lot of my wounds, I had started a slow road back to loving myself. But when love in the form of my husband came back into my life (after a 25 year absence, but that’s another story!), oh my goodness, it was like inner work on steroids!

And now I have all this glorious sisterly love, which is an entirely new phenomenon for me. This love and support I get from Meghan and Hayley and the women in our GKU* world is all the success I could ever wish for.

Love IS the greatest success, it’s the thing that is worth fighting for, it’s the thing worth showing up for every single day.

And patience. Oh, I have known since the very beginning of my Gene Keys journey that patience is key to my success on this path of transformation. The first time I heard Richard Rudd talk about it, I knew I’d come to the right place! I have long known, long before I found the Gene Keys, that patience is one of the greatest lessons I am here to learn.

Patience with myself and with this process is absolutely key to my success.

And like I say, it’s not easy for me, but I 100% resonate with the concept of patience as a measure of my success as a human who is evolving.

Patience and the Core Wound

As I write this Wizardly Word article, I am moving into my Core Wound on our Devoted journey, and I know that I am going to need buckets full of patience with myself. This is the second time I’ve been through my Gene Keys Golden Path, and the little impatient voice inside me is saying … aren’t you healed YET?!

The wounded healer - you are not here to heal every single thing.
These are the wounds you carry; these are the wounds that help you to access your gift. And it takes time, and patience and a shit load of self-love.
Hayley Curtis

Maybe this is the perfect place to be, as I reach the end of the Venus Sequence for the second time, to learn what Patience really is!

This work was never meant to heal every single damn wound; I’m not turning into some realised being who has transmutated into a higher frequency being with no wounds! Because the truth is, I like my life here on this earthly world; this work is bringing me to the place of the wounded healer that so many cultures have spoken of. A place where I’ve done enough healing that I am able to shine a light on others to help them see their wounds and to help them start their own healing process.

In many cultures there is a mythic tradition known as the ‘wounded healer’. This term may have first been coined by Carl Jung in describing his own journey of healing and integration, but the myth of the wounded healer or physician seems to be pervasive. In the Bible, Arthurian legends, Norse and Greek myth, Hebrew lore, and many of the Eastern traditions, there is a tradition of a figure who having wrestled with their own vulnerability in some way then becomes a healer and guide for others.
Richard Rudd

My wounds are keys that help me to access my Gifts. Wow! And it’s okay that I don’t have all the keys yet. This is a life-long journey I am on. It doesn’t stop with the Venus sequence. I don’t think it will stop with the Pearl. I think that every step forward I take in this journey, is going to reveal more and more of my Gifts, of my genius, of my magic.

Love is the only currency worth having. Love needs to be my core. Love needs to be my touchstone. Love needs to be the place I hold sacred in my heart, my safe place, that I carry with me, so that the wounds are not too heavy.

Hayley and Richard both keep telling me … IT TAKES TIME!!! THERE’S NO RUSH!!!

So, I must have patience, with myself and with the process. I must be gentle, for I do still have wounds, so tenderness is required. And I must love myself. I must love my wounds and my healing, my Shadows and my Gifts. I must wait patiently and, in that gap of waiting patiently, the answers will come.

Footnote

If you are curious to know more about the path of patience, then you might want to invest in The Dream Arc course.

The Dream Arc is a giant invitation to be patient – patient with yourself, patient with your process, patient with the whole wide world. If one of your deepest longings is to help heal historical wounds, transform collective conditioning and bring in a new Golden Age, then, believe me, you’re going to need a lot of patience, maybe lifetimes of patience.
Rosy Aronson 

All photographs used in this post (apart from Meghan’s image of the elephant) were taken by me. If you’d like to explore more of my photographs, you can check out my Flickr page.

*GKU … Gene Keys Unleashed with Hayley Curtis